God Normally Doesn’t Take Short-Cuts

I don’t know if you are like me, but I love short-cuts, whether it is short-cuts in learning something, household chores, travel, etc…   But, I have noticed that God normally doesn’t like to use short cuts.  For those of you who don’t know Travis and I are praying about some big decisions and it gets frustrating at times that we don’t have the answers or confirmation yet, but we know that God is leading us and will show us the way, in His timing.    I was feeling rather frustrated one day, and went to the Dentist, afterwards I gave into my addiction and hit the Goodwill next door, there I spotted an interesting little book, the title really jumped out at me and has been a great blessing during this time.  The title was, “God isn’t in a hurry”.  So true, many times I am though, much like a donkey wanting to rush ahead.

So just to let you know we are seeking and waiting.  Waiting on God’s timing to open and close doors, on His timing to sell our house, on His timing to work in people’s lives  that we are interceding for.  

 

In some ways it is exciting, who knows where this long way will take us.  

The Struggle with Modesty….

Okay ladies,  this is a confessional blog post about modesty.  This is not meant to be a legalistic blog or a condemning blog but just my journey and my confession that I have not always walked the walk in regards to modesty.

I am grateful for a husband who desires for me to dress modestly, however I have at times not liked this and thought he wanted me to dress like the “Amish”.  It definately  does come down to a “heart” issue and “humilty”.  Humbling oneself to dress in a way that would not make others stumble.

I think we as Christian women do not dress modestly for several reasons.  One reason would be we are “striving”, maybe we struggle with a low self esteem and we are striving to prove that we still have it. Meaning, we are “attractive” or are desirable.  I know these feelings, after having three kids and about to turn 30.  We desire to be just as attractive as the others around us.  There are so many images of what beauty is bombarding women in the world and even in the church world.

I find it interesting that I don’t struggle with the temptation to dress immodestly or worry about what I am wearing until I am around that “group” of people.  Since I have been out of the mainstream church circles for a while, I notice that it doesn’t concern me as much.  But you know those circles…and I am talking of church circles where everyone is dressed so hip and cool.  Some of the outfits really attracting the eye… when I am around these people I noticed that I start feeling very aware of how I am dressed and how “they” are dressed.  I have even noticed myself- trying to dress to fit in when I am around that “crowd”.  Now something is wrong with this picture.

When I am around “that crowd”  I also struggle with jealousy- my mind is preoccupied with, “I hope Travis is looking at that!”  “Oh my gosh, I can see her thong!”  When women are dressed immodestly, I lose respect for them and immediately think that they are out to cause men to stumble.  Now I know that is not true, but it is a struggle I have and a distrust of women.

I also notice myself when I am around my refugee friends trying to dress down and feeling a bit guilty for caring about what I wear, when they wear the same things over and over.  Or if they have strict cultural modesty guidelines I try to dress appropriately.   My Muslim friends would be appalled in our churches at the way women dress.  Their standard has definitely challenged me and made me think about this issue.

I think another reason we dress immodestly is out of pride.  We want to show off what we have and we want others to know it. It takes humility to wear clothes that don’t flatter as much.

I just wonder if others see what I see and struggle the way I do.  I see Christian women showing off their goods in short shorts and sports bra tops at the Gym.  I see moms going to pick up their kids at  a Christian school in short tennis skirts and tops and I think are they even aware of what they are doing.  It is distracting and even I notice and I am a woman.

I just want to give props to all those ladies out there who dress modestly- I admire you.  Thank you for making it easier for me as I struggle with this.  I also just want to be clear that I am not perfect at this, it is a very fine line when getting dressed-whether you are dressing to attract or to be attractive.

If you know me, you know I love cute clothes-and I buy all my classic style clothes at the Goodwill.  But I want to be known as a woman who is beautiful on the inside-who is not striving for the world’s  stamp of approval.  It only gets worse as we get older wanting to look like the younger crowd.  Our beauty is
Christ in us- I want to be confident and beautiful because of the Love of Jesus working in and through my life.  I am not there yet, I still care.  I still don’t like to leave the house without a little lipstick.  I still am a little self-conscious.  But I am growing….

I would love your thoughts on this topic…..

^{1 Peter 3:3}

Your adornment must not be merely external–braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; ⁴but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.

PEACE….

Around Thanksgiving, our simple church was able to take some gift cards to some refugee families to bless them.  In our card we left our phone numbers and said, we would love to be friends and help them in any way.  Over the past couple of years the ministry we are a part of called City on a Hill Connection has been reaching out to the Cuban refugees, playing baseball with them etc..

Well, there were two couples living in the apartment we took the gift cards to…Maite and Odalys are the two women.  They started calling me, and I began visiting them.  We quickly became friends.  At new years, Odalys said, it was her new years resolution to know more about God.  We gave them bibles at their request and began meeting together weekly or more to practice English and to do Chronological Bible Storying.  They are hearing and learning God’s story and plan for redemption.  Some lessons we have watched the Hope Story online.  But more than anything we have fun, laugh, cry, and talk about the Hope we have in Jesus.

Some things  I have learned from these ladies is powerful.  We see these refugees as having so little but as she expressed this week, that the first two years she was here she had everything, people were blessing them with stuff etc.. They got their first credit card and got into debt, buying a tv and couch etc..  She said, “What good are possessions if you don’t have inner peace.”

So profound.  I am blown away by how God is moving in these two ladies lives.  Over the past 3-5 years I have worked with people and noticed that there is so much spiritual apathy.   People will meet with me for a little while then fade away or not commit or not show up.  These ladies are the most dedicated and commited ladies I have seen.  I am so grateful. I know this is the activity of God, you can’t force people into the kingdom or have a desire to know him.  It is from the spirit.

Odalys says, the reason she is so commited is because when she comes to my house and learns about Jesus she feels peace.  It is the only place where she feels like that- so she will drop what ever she is doing and come with me on Mondays.

These two ladies are very close to coming into the kingdom, it’s like I can see the spirit drawing them as they learn about him.  I pray for them because they have many trials in their home life.  I am praying big prayers that Jesus will transform their lives and their entire household like the story of Lydia in the bible.  Please pray with me for this.

My precious new friend Safula is coming on these days as well, we meet for spiritual accountability and prayer before hand and then she joins me in ministering to these ladies.  I look forward to telling you more about this awesome woman of God.

Life Changing Experiences…

Hi Friends, I am sorry I haven’t been blogging lately, I have tossed around the idea of just quiting for good.  I was encouraged via facebook to share a little about some of my life-changing experiences overseas.

Well, several months after Travis and I got married, we packed up everything and went to Aurora, CO to serve with Kingdom Building Ministries.  It is an amazing ministry that disciples young adults and encourages them in their walk and how God desires to use them as Kingdom laborers.   That summer we were supposed to go to China- but it was the year a US plane was shot down and travel warnings were issued for that country.  So then we were suppoesed to go to Nepal, but a week before our team of 12 or so were about to leave, the king’s son killed the entire family and the country was under 24 hour state of emergency.  So at the last minute we had to find a place to take our team and make travel arrangements and get visas etc…

Well, God was completely in the entire situation.  We ended up going to Siem Reap, Cambodia.  The home of Angkor Wat. We arrived and the missionary was so humble and kind and  I remember our first visit, his eyes filled with tears with gratitude to God for bringing our team.  It was and answer to their prayers.  Our team would be such a blessing to them to help start some new works that summer.  One was teaching English in a Teacher’s college, Teaching English on Floating School houses in the Tonle Sap Lake, and helping out at an Orphanage.

The poverty was unbelievable.  Unlike I had ever experienced.  The floating village was something very hard to describe.  But I experienced something there that was unique.  When we shared the gospel, they would say, “Is this true, this is good, this is good!”  It gave me a new appreciation for the phrase “good news”.  The floating village is on the largest lake in Asia where millions of people live in small boats, harvesting fish under thatched rafts- it is an unbelievable sight and smell. The monks rarely go out that far to these poor people.

Well, after our team taught in the schools and would visit homes/boats on the weekends, they held a gathering on land for the children and their parents.  Some of the parents spoke up at the end and said, “As for some of us, we believe, but if you leave, who will tell us more.”  Wow,  how can you forget something like that.  The reality that millions are dying without hope of Christ in some of the worst conditions in the world.  It reminds me of the verse in Romans 10 that says:

How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? 15And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”^[g]

Anyways, that summer really confirmed that God had placed a special call on our family to go to those who have never heard of Jesus.

For Love is as Strong as Death…

Today my Uncle Melvin Watson died, from a year long battle with cancer that ravaged his body.  He fought very hard up until his last breathes.  Jesus has been at work during his suffering and I have been impacted by witnessing his last days.  I have never been this close to the process of death. 

I have been blown away most by the love of my Aunt Dyan as I watched her lay in the bed for hours, stroking his head, lovingly massaging his hands and feet, whispering her last expressions of love as he lay unresponsive in his final hours.  It was the most heartaching yet beautiful scene, the deepest emotions of love and anguish expressed, in sobs, moans, cries etc…  What love…

It was a long journey….  I have been touched by the way Aunt Dyan cared for him day in and day out- over the past year loving him, serving him in all ways.  This is what love is.  I have been moved by the devotion she has for her husband, I know that they went through many trials over the years but Christ’s love triumphed in their marriage.  What beauty is love, even in loss.

I pray that Jesus will fill her and my cousins with His love, that is an even greater expression of love in the midst of loss.  That God would send his only son to suffer and die for our sins. 

One of the most beautiful moments was on Thanksgiving evening when Travis and I my cousins went up to the hospital to visit with Uncle Bud for a little.  I knew it would be my last time to visit with him when he was responsive and alive.  He looked so orange and jaundice from the cancer, but we were able to get him to laugh a little. Before we left we had a short time of prayer.  Jesus was with us as we prayed.  During the prayer I heard my Uncle cry out to Jesus, thanking him for dying on the cross for him- it was the cry of a  broken man about to see his savior.  It was beautiful… it was love. 

The word says, that perfect love cast out fear.  This was a growing time for me to see that yes, death is ugly and painful for all involved.  But Jesus’ perfect love should cast out all fear- as we put our trust in our savior we have hope that we will be with him in heaven- because of his great sacrifice and plan for redemption.

Thank you Jesus this Thanksgiving… Thank you for your love… thank you for your work in Bud’s life.

Things I love…

*Children’s voices singing

*Warm cookies with milk

*Breakfast foods

*Laughing

*Making people laugh

*A listening ear

*Gracious people who extend Grace freely and extravangently

*Smiles

*The funny things my kids say

*To snuggle in the morning with my little ones

*Isaac’s bald head and blue eyes

* Hearing my girls laugh in the bath

*Unexpected blessings

*God’s provision

* Being accepted and loved by Jesus

* His Mercy and patience with me

*Travis’ love for me and our family- in word and deed

* Our extended family- talks with them on the phone and our visits

* Teachable spirits

* Learning new things

* Hearing God stories

And many more….

A Must See Video!

Have you ever read the bible and been confused about things such as how does the Old Testament fit with the New Testament?  What do Noah and Jonah have to do with Jesus Christ?

Why did Jesus have to die for our sins?

Please watch this movie online… at www.thehopeproject.com

It narrates the Story of God from Creation to Christ with great visual affects and dramatization.  It comes in English, Spanish, and many other languages.  It is well made!  I thoroughly enjoyed it!

Some Great Examples….

Over the last month or so I have been visiting Mission Arlington.  Mission Arlington is a mission that takes church to the people, the poor and the forgotten. Every Sunday there are about 280 bible studies going on in various apartments or apartment clubhouses in Arlington. The things I have been impressed about their ministry is the desire to combine both mercy ministries such as food and clothing distribution, job training, health and dental clinics, counseling, etc.. with evangelism and discipleship.  It is so cool to see how they are ministering to a diverse group of people in Arlington.  This past Sunday we served in a Hispanic outreach in an Apartment complex.  I was so impressed that the leader, her name is Emily has been serving there for 10 years.  She has led many to Christ and baptized and discipled them.  Serving and living in an apartment in the complex so that she is close and available to serve after school and in other ways.  Wow, the commitment and the perseverance to serve. One 50 year old Asian man named Jim shared his testimony Sunday, he came to Christ about a year ago and Emily baptized him.  It was awesome to hear him say how his life had completely changed since that day.  The gathering started in a clubhouse room that was given to them, we had singing, Emily shared some scripture and an evangelistic short challenge.  We then split up into 4 groups, Spanish speaking children, english speaking children, youth and Jim, and adult Spanish speakers for bible study.  We ended with a snack- one or two cookies.   Simple, yet profound!  During the singing, we sang to the accompianmnet of a CD player, one of the women was truly touched by the words of the song, I felt in my Spirit that Jesus was pleased with their worship.

A couple of weekends ago I met another lady that has been serving in an outreach in a primarily African American area for 12 years.  Serving sacrificially, loving, and sharing the hope of Jesus in that community.  It was awesome to see true followers of Jesus, children who loved him, and knew about him.  Some whose parents were in prison were there, and were being taught how to follow Jesus.

It reminds me of the verse in the bible that talks about serving those who can never repay you.

Luke 14:12-14 (New International Version)

12Then Jesus said to his host, “When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. 13But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, 14and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”

I have seen some incredible examples of woman that are living lives for the Kingdom of God.  I was humbled by their examples.  And of course Mrs. Tillie Burgin, the director and founder of Mission Arlington who is in her 70’s is one of the best examples I have seen of a Woman4thekingdom.  If you live in the DFW area, I recommend that you go on their tour.  It is called the Tillie Tour, she drives you around to various apartment churches.  They meet at 10:00 on Sundays at the Mission Arlington headquarters on Abram for the Tour.  Check it out yourselves.

Living for Christ in Suburbia…

Wow, so much is in my head… I have been on a journey..struggling with how to live the Christ life in my current situation in Suburbia with three kids. Well the Lord is showing me a few things on my journey.  These aren’t in any order.. I am just typing as I think of them…

1.One is to live a life of simplicity… this started months back or maybe more, feeling called to simplify, downsize, give away excess, learn to be a good steward of my spending in regards to budgeting etc… so we will be free to give to others and because “stuff” tends to take over your life.  Caring for it, cleaning it, organizing it, etc…  Try to live counter-culture in this area… don’t have fancy cars, don’t upgrade homes, appliances, clothes, toys etc… Buy used, give freely, let God provide.  It is a process, but I continually find more freedom as I give away… really things have no sentimental value, the only things sentimental would be old pictures.  But to be good stewards, taking good care of what the Lord has provided already.

2.Next, a pursuit of purity in heart- continually examining  myself, character issues, sinful attitudes, pride etc.. that needs to be repented of and conformed to the attitude of Christ.

3. To be a Kingdom “Laborer”-hard worker and to not choose the easy path.   A laborer is a hardworker and during the time of harvest there is no time for rest… you work and work till it is all in or the food will spoil.  I realize the need to not choose what is easy but to labor for Christ- and to perservere.  This includes sacrifices like not going to a wonderful progam oriented church- but instead serving and starting new works with the lost…  This means no childcare or nursery for my three little ones, but being flexible and including them in ministry.  It means instead of enjoying the confines of my home, opening my doors and spending time with neighborhood kids and parents in the front yard in the evenings.   It means praying, fasting, and sowing seed by sharing with those who I know do not know Jesus… making this my greatest pursuit in life.  It means during my two mornings without the older kids, finding ways to minister instead of having alone time and going shopping.

4. A desire to please God and not man… This one is hard for me- to serve the Lord with pure heart and motivations for the audience of one.. even in the face of opposition or discouragement.  To not give up, but be faithful where the Lord has placed me.

5. To not be so busy and scheduled that I don’t have time for God and where he is working.  Ministry is the interruptions.

6.  To be passionate for the unreached, those who have never heard the good news of Jesus.  A focus on refugees living in the U.S. and abroad.

7.  To have a heart for the poor… and children who are so teachable and open to Jesus.  They really are so precious.  “I always say, the only people who think I am still funny are kids and old people “

8. To guard my tongue- what I say and what I hear.  To guard against a critical spirit.

9.  To spend time with Jesus- learning to hear his voice, to know his word, and to obey his commands.

10. To model a Christ like love in the home, having a serving spirit and patience with my husband and children and with those I am in relationship with.

11.  To choose to not please myself, but to give up my rights, dreams, plans, agenda etc… for Christ’s will in my relationships, ministry, and life.

These are all just some areas the Lord is dealing with me about… sometimes I really screw up, getting impatient, selfish, wanting to give up… etc..  But I know that I have been called by Jesus to serve him, I heard the call years ago, and for me… I must be different.  I must choose a different path, a path that will be difficult… but I want to follow Jesus and where he desires to take me.

What Motivates You?

Here is a list of common things that motivate us…

fear, selfishness, money, pleasure, jealousy, approval of others, pride, guilt, legalism, duty,etc…

These motivations will fizzle out when things are tough… K.P. Yohannon calls these horizontal motivations.  When we are tested they won’t be enough to keep going.  The only motivation that will last is Love of Jesus…His love motivates us.. so we can love even in the toughest of circumstances.

Are you being tested in your ability to love?  I am…

Here are some keys to being filled anew with his love..

Repent, Surrender everything to Jesus, be filled with His Spirit, Do everything unto the Lord and not men,  think about heaven,

“When you lack love for your brothers and sisters around you, becoming short-tempered and impatient and expecting the worst from others, it indicates you are not motivated by the love of the Father”

“No love is genuine unless it includes suffering”

I have been and am currently struggling with this issue… I am in the repent and surrender stage… if your struggling too, come, join me in the journey, seeking to lay down my life- being filled with His love, so I can love others.  It is hard.. embracing the cross in our lives.

It’s easy to love this little guy!  But not so easy to love others…:)

Luke 6:31-33 (New International Version)

31Do to others as you would have them do to you.

32“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even ’sinners’ love those who love them. 33And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even ’sinners’ do that.